sailing

i was thinking maybe i could finish my novels ( those are some reread-books anyway.) tonight,but then i end of spending whole 3 hours watching the videos from "A New Brain" ( the musical i have always loved ) on youtube. i have always loved the song "I rather go sailing",if i could be on one musical,it will be this one and i want to play Gordon's boyfriend Roger so i can sing this song. How nice for Roger to love Gordon this way,and you know how it feels you could just die in one's arms. ( noooo,Gordon lives ) And right now i am repeating Hikki's "Prisoner Of Love" so i can hear the line "STAY WITH ME...STAY WITH ME...". A random thought : i always think if i want to write a diary or a note or something,i have to have a picture to go with it,it is better done by me,less better with a picture i took ( i don't have a camera anymore ),and it is the worst if i post something from the Internet. that is the reason i write so seldom. but i just found out that why not just draw a picture in 5 mins,it is not that hard,though i always tell myself it is very hard .
i wish you can understand this,that's why i am writing in english. i still can't go to bed at a time like this. i don't know how to.